The loney star;

Sheeesh. I'm so bored. Revised lerh! Here are some retarded lines I made up in my desperate endeavour to keep me from boredom. (Note that the 1st line is the original saying and is red.)

When life gives you a lemon, make lemonade.
When life gives you a lemon, trade it for an apple.

Time and Tide waits for no man.
Time and Tide starts with the letter 'T'.

Life is full of surprises.
But none of them is in your favour.

Life is full of twist and turns.
But I'd prefer to walk straight.

Go fly a kite.
Really?! It's windy outside too!

Life is never smooth-sailing,
But I'm walking.

A penny for your thoughts.
Mine are for a pound.

Violence gets you nowhere
Objection! It gets me into trouble.

Casting pearls before swine.
At least pearls don't get swine flu.

Add fuel to the flames.
Trust me you won't want to.

Between the devil and the deep blue sea.
I can swim thank you.

Empty vessels make the most noise.
That makes me awfully quiet. :D

Think twice before you act.
Like that will make me change my mind.

Hate the sin, love the sinner.
This is what makes Hitler so popular.

Ignorance is bliss,
I'd gladly stay that way.

Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to make them come true.
Happier are those that their dreams come true without making them.

Misery needs company,
Accompanied with more misery.

Happiness is the best face lift.
While that is true, punches make better face shifts.

Every thing comes to the end some day.
So why bother starting it in the first place?

Honesty is the best policy.
Not exactly.

Great minds run in the same channel.
Fools' minds turns to the wrong channel.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.
Funny how he won't get tired of fish.

I never need to see the sun again, there is enough light in your eyes to light up all the world.
What a small world you live in.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me!
Fool me thrice, I'm gonna get you.

Knowledge talks, wisdom listens,
and Stupidity goes out to play.

Two wrongs do not make a right.
Three should be perfect then.

Look after number one.
I'm taking great care of it.

Blood is thicker than water.
That's common sense.

Trust is the mother of deceit.
Who's the father then?

First think, and then speak.
What difference does it make? There is no filter between my brain and my mouth!

Criticizing is easy, art is difficult.
That explains the 'F' I got on my report slip.

He who fails to plan, plans to fail.
That's not very wise is it?

Why are the words goodbye, I'm sorry and I love you, so easy to pronounced, but so hard to say?
It is called overwhelming reluctance.

Only your real friends tell you when your face is dirty.
Because nobody else thought it made a difference.

Time goes by a lot slower when you miss the one you love.
Crikey! How time flies!

I did three things today; miss you, miss you, miss you.
What constructive use of time. It seems that schools don't give enough assignments.

No one becomes perfect, but some become great.
WITH SOME EXCEPTIONS jkjk.

Notice the difference between what a man says to himself, "I have failed 3 times," and what happens when he says, "I am a failure."
The man is just stubborn the first time round and honest in the second.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
So is parachuting.

If at first you do succeed - try hiding your astonishment.
That will be comforting to people who failed many times.

Don't teach my grandmother to suck eggs,
Just teach her how to cook them.

Failure breeds Success ,Success is not bred overnight
Of course! It takes 9 months.

No matter what you do, there will always be critics.
That's me.